sass

so sassy magazine is great:

and their advice column, "ask a boy" was fantastic. this one was with iggy pop:

PHLEGM-HATING PHEMS
We are writing to ask you a very simple question: Why do guys spit? This really grosses us out, and we would like to know if it’s a genetic defect or something. Sarah and Morgan, Portland, ME

A guy spits to humiliate that which he spits on, or sometimes as a gesture of a carelessness he does not otherwise possess. He frees himself of his salivary phlegmatic burden and the weight it signifies, with no thought of where the viscous missile may land. Ptooey!

DOWN, BOY
I’v ebeen going out with this guy for about three weeks. Problem is, he’s obviously taking this relationship a lot more seriously than I am. He always tells me he loves me, and I tell him I don’t see how. We talk on the phone every day for hours, but I’m not ready for all that mushy stuff. How do I make him back off and give me some breathing room? Help! Smothered in NJ

Right now, when he talks to you, he’s really just talking to himself. Stars are in his eyes. Later, when he finds out how dumb and self-centered you are, he’ll learn to hate you. It shouldn’t take long.

THAT SUCKING SOUND
How do you know if someone is giving you a hickey? Sometimes I don’t know it’s happening, and then the next day I have some explaining to do. Dawn, Chicago, IL

Wow! OK, it kind of feels like you’re being nibbled on by an electric rattlesnake.

FOLDED, SPINDLED AND MUTILATED SF SEEKS SAME
I am a punk girl who likes tattoos, body piercing, hair dying, shaved heads and bi-level haircuts. I would like to know if guys dig these forms of “defacing” on girls. Stephanie, Sioux City, IA

I like any form of adornment if it says you do what you feel. I used to have a crush on a girl from Texas who dyed her hair lavendar with Magic Markers. I was never with her, but I never forgot her.

IT’S NOT FAIR!
My friends and I were looking through magazines, and we are disgusted by all the naked women we found in them. We didn’t find any naked men at all. We also discovered this is true with movies and music videos. Do you think this is right? Sick of seeing naked women

Naked is a beautiful thing. When you’re naked you’re vulnerable, and that’s why women are shown that way habitually in our society, and men are not. It’s a way of saying women are possessions, like cattle (naked animals). The men, however, remain clothed to reinforce their dignity as masters. All this BS is useless and hurts everybody. If you want to see naked men dealt with powerfully as an image, you can turn to painting, sculpture and serious photography — from Francis Bacon to Mapplethorpe back to Michelangelo or Goya. As for American movies, magazines and videos, forget it; they all suck and have no guts. My live video Kiss My Blood contains some nudity. You might like it.

IT’S NOT FAIR! 2
I’d like to know why boys always want to knows about my past (like who I’ve gone out with, who I have kissed, and if I’ve had sex with anyone) but then won’t tell me about their past. DS, Falls City, OR

Some boys are like dogs in that they’ll want to “sniff around” constantly for signs of other boys. When you’re close with a guy like this, your body becomes a kid of “location” to him, and he wants to know what other dogs have been there. Pretty sick, eh? It gets weirder. Once you give this guy a name or even admit you’ve been intimate with someone else, he’ll begin to play “compare” in his head and drive you both nuts. It he’s an OK guy, he won’t ask you at all. He should give you that respect and enjoy your mystery.

INCREASE YOUR WORD POWER
In your definition, what is a skanky girl? Just wondering

When you’re kinda looking her over and you get the feeling she’s kinda lost and maybe has gone a few rounds but still loves to get down with whoever’s around ’cause she doesn’t wanna be alone and her eyes look a little tired, but even with all that she’s sexy somehow ’cause the goods are basically appealing to you on a musty, musky level and you can in fact smell her and you decide you want her then she’s skanky.

SEXUAL IDENTITY – WHAT A PAIN
A couple of months ago, I had my first sexual encounter — with a girl. I was nervous when we started kissing but relaxed into it. I had a weird feeling afterward. I know I’m not a lesbian, but maybe I’m bisexual. How do you know? What will happen when it starts again? I already feel out of place at school. A devoted reader

I think it’s pretty natural to enjoy being close to a girl, because so many girls are beautiful. Why not relax and see where it takes you in your feelings? Don’t worry about school — life is a lot bigger than school. Nobody really knows where their sex drive will lead them, and it’s a personal choice whether you want it to lead you at all. Right now, you’re young and your feelings and senses are really strong. I don’t believe in any rules about who is OK to love and touch and who is not, so at least you’re not out of place with me. Please don’t feel bad if you’re confused or feel many conflicting things — these matters are almost hopelessly complex for anyone.

KURT LODER WANNABE
My boyfriend’s band really sucks. How do I tell him without crushing his ego? Luna, San Francisco, CA

This is impossible to do because his band and his ego are the same thing. You’d be a fool to interfere. Expressing himself in a band and choosing the friends he plays with are ways of showing his personality to the world and are very sensitive things. Who are you to criticize that? A girlfriend is a girlfriend, and a critic is a critic. Choose one or the other — you can’t be both.

here's a fab blog with loads of scans of the sassy: http://sassyscans.tumblr.com/